Tuesday, February 8, 2011

On Being Seen from Airplanes

When I first tried sunbathing naked in a remote location, it bothered me when an airplane would fly overhead.  Could they see me?  Could they tell I was naked?  Worrying about such things is a distraction to enjoying oneself in remote locations, nude beaches, nude resorts, or even in one's own back yard.

As an active private pilot, I have a unique perspective on this.  I've flown over many of the nudist resorts and nude beaches I've been to here in Florida at the minimum legal altitudes allowed, so I can safely say, the answer is no!  Even if you know where to look and what you're looking for, you can't tell if the people you can see below are clothed or not.  To get the same effect, go to Google Earth, ask it to find a nudist resort (yeah, it will), and go zoom down to about 1000 feet above and try to make out if the people are naked or not.  Yes, you can tell they're people, but you can't make out what or if they're wearing anything.

If, by some chance, an airplane or helicopter is low enough to tell what you're wearing, as if they don't have other things to be looking out for when they're that low with the ground so rapidly going by, they can get in real big trouble for being that low.  If you can read their "N" number without binoculars, Google it, look up who owns the airplane, report them to the FAA and their employer, and you can easily get them fired or their license suspended.

Besides, YOU'RE not doing anything wrong!  They are if they're that low.  Yes, the police can fly low if they have reason to, but their chief is not going to take lightly a call from a citizen complaining that they're being gawked at from the air.

So... If an airplane keeps buzzing by low, reach for binoculars.  If they can see that you're naked, they can see that you're looking through something and they'll know they're in big big trouble.  Otherwise, simile, wave, moon them, or shoot them the bird.  Or just ignore them altogether.  Very likely, even if they are too low, they'll never see you, and you shouldn't care.


  1. The only time I get under cover for an aircraft is when it's the police helicopter! That's a little to low for me.

    1. I no longer worry about them. Yes, in the line of duty, they're allowed to be lower. But I'm not breaking any laws, and they know if I can easily read their tail number, they're the ones in trouble and not me.